Kids, by June 2019, the flirtation with Jet was at an impasse. We’d moved beyond the shy greetings and gentle teasing at the office with plenty of interaction at our recent company staff party. We’d been seen together so often and there were videos of the night’s events where he was caught on camera staring […]
Test tube: “Hey Beautiful. Do you come here often?” Me: ” Only when I’m trying to get knocked up by you.” Even in my f***ed up fantasies about conceiving you by sperm donation, I utterly sucked at flirting… Kids, in the winter of 2018, I was facing the very real and harsh reality that meeting […]
Kids,falling in love is a miraculous thing… that butterflies-in-the-tummy feeling,the bounce in your step when you see the object of your affection,the smirk you give when they say or do something silly and sweet,the hours (and I mean hours) of crazy back and forth texting and the way your heart soars when they utter your […]
Kids,I’ve found over the long, LONG course of my singlehood that people (i.e. wives and girlfriends) assume that single women are so desperate, they are hitting on guys,especially attached ones, constantly. Oh hell no! More often than not, we’re batting these desperate men away with holy water and a cross: Case in point: my shady […]
Kids, as you’ll recall, I hit the pause button on finding your Dad as a birthday present to myself in November 2017…One week and a bit into this experiment, things were going relatively well. With my fingers getting a break from swiping left or right and my eyes lifted up and away from my phone […]
I wanted you more than my own soul but the sheer effort it was taking to meet a mostly decent, straight, emotionally and financially stable, quirky, interesting, well traveled and good man was killing me.
Kids, in September 2017,my wandering heart (and very busy working body – wait… not like THAT!) found its way to the sensual and vibrant Buenos Aires, Argentina. Resting place of Evita, home to the empanada, the Japanese Botanical Garden and… tango! As I mentioned before, this was a business trip so there wasn’t much time […]
Kids, today’s abject lesson in why people should mind their own gods-be-damned business comes in the form of a public service announcement I wrote in September 2017. Have a gander at this: Dear Smug Marrieds and Otherwise Attached People (including my f***tard of an Uber driver the other night), This evening I had to listen […]