Tag Archives: me too

How I Met Your Father: the one with the creepy old guys pt 2

Kids, in the winter of 2019, I was confronted with the skin-crawling, gag-inducing specimen of men: the creepy old guy.

Image credit: Pinterest

There I was,shaking what your Nan gave me at a friend’s birthday house party to my ultimate favourite jam…

…when I hear this old guy, and I am talking walking with a walking stick old, calls out to me from behind the wooden security gate:

“Lekker girl! Skud daai lyf ( Nice, girl. Shake that booty!)”

I immediately stopped and walked into the house as this lecherous creep joined the party.

Image credit: Giphy

Of course, Geriatric McCreepy waited until I returned to the party area to further his molestation cause with this line:

“What’s your name? Fazielah? Fazielah, ek will net sê…. Jy is fokken sexy, hor! ( I just wanted to say … you’re fucking sexy!)”

I think I threw up in my mouth a little because ewwww but also:

Image credit: Giphy

I hate that I didn’t tell this man to f*** right off or call my female friends out on not doing anything to stop him when clearly I was so f***ing uncomfortable.

Old, horny men like him are allowed to get away with their despicable behaviour because the community brushes it away with the ol’ “he is from another era and that’s how they talk to women” excuse.

Uhm, no…

Image credit: Giphy

I didn’t say anything and gave him a wide berth until he left of his own accord but I vowed to myself that this shit would end with me.

I did not want you guys growing up in a society that perpetuated the cycle of molestation and unwanted advances. From then on, I’d raise my voice and objections to being objectified!

How I Met Your Father: A PSA to men who have no idea of how to talk to women PT2

Kids, you remember the jackass coworker who had the bloody nerve to yell at me about when I was going to get married, back in the winter of 2018?

Image credit: http://ukdaynews.biz

Well, in December 2018, Mr Asshole was at it again…

“Fazielah”, he said as he tapped my shoulder and got way too far up in my personal space for my liking, “I said, your naughty Santa’s Elf costume is only a quarter complete with that hat. Where’s the short, sexy mini skirt and hot red high heels?”

Now, Kids, please take a minute to appreciate the fact that I, in no way at all, was being overtly sexual in my demeanour or dress style at this point – not that it should matter,because however a woman dresses or acts,she is not asking to be sexually harrassed,ever.

I quite literally was wearing workman’s jeans, a standard work issue t-shirt, hiker boots and the afore-mentioned hat and unlike a nurse or fireman’s costume, my mountain clothing wasn’t a f*** sexy.

His comment made me see red.

Me, too f***ing outraged and surprised that once again this motherf***ing ass of a married man who clearly did not realise we were living in the age of the #MeToo movement, would be this f***ing oblivious and
chauvinistic: “Uhm, well, that kind of attire wouldn’t be appropriate for the mountain.”

Prize Jerk Nr 1 laughed and walked away, leaving me feeling like I had just let myself and the entire female population of the world and generations to come down.

Why the f*** were men still getting away with this kind of bullshit?

I understand that decades of the naughty Santa’s elf imagery has saturated mainstream media and given rise to countless fantasies and role play scenarios but for the love of the gods, most f***ing people keep that shit to themselves, their partners and their bedrooms.

Married men, sure as shit, shouldn’t be saying kak like that to single women, or any woman for that matter, at all and utterly unprovoked!

It would take me a while to work up the courage to confront this world-class f***er about his inappropriate banter but I sure as f*** would.

Here’s what I did want to say to him and all men like him, though:

“Listen, you arrogant d*** … just because I was trying to be a good sport and get into the spirit of Christmas with a hat doesn’t give you the right to ignore all professional and personal boundaries and spew lecherous shit at me whenever you see fit!

I reserve the right to wear what I want, when I want to and to not have you comment on it. I f***ing love Christmas, I love Santa and by the gods, I wish I could be an elf but I do not dress up for you or your f***ing base pleasure. Take your dirty mind and go play dress up with your wife. Leave me the f*** alone!”