Kids, as you know, your Spirit Mom, spirit siblings Kris and Heidi and I were major cosplayers and in 2017, we jumped at the chance to once again raise our House of Wyrd freak flag at FanCon: Cape Town Comic Con at the Cape Town International Convention Centre on Saturday 29 April, 2017.
This time round, I left the Wonder Woman costume at home while Kris absolutely rocked his Teddybear Tuxedo Minigun costume from the Fallout video game:
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From superhero themed jewellery and glitter tattoos to endless geek memorabilia and opportunities to meet our favourite comic book authors, there was just SO much to see and do at FanCon.
Kris went nuts for all of the cool jewellery at the Treasure Box stand, picking up a really lifelike looking Horcrux, from the famed Harry Potter series, while we snagged a gorgeous Tardis print for Leo in the Art Alley:
Here are few of the awesome social media posts by fellow geeks of the event:
Kids, every now and again, when the horrors of online dating got too much for me, I’d pack up my bags and hot foot it to another city to clear my head. Johannesburg, or Jozi as it is affectionately known, and a visit with your godfather Leon beckoned in March 2017…
Yes, I make him pose for endless photos but Leon doesn’t mind when I make him look good. Taken at the Maboneng Precinct
In celebration of Lee’s 29th (again, haha) birthday and so that I could be his personal photographer all weekend long, we sampled all of the city’s ample delights including:
Beefy Boys:
Your Spirit Mom Leo and I have been to the Cape Town branch of Beefcakes so often, we have our designated table so it was only right for me to pay the JHB restaurant a visit too…
And boy, was I delighted with their considerable, uh, assets:
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Adonis sightseeing aside, the Illovo site has a top-notch line-up of performers, including the Menopause drag trio and it was so worth a fun night out!
Hipster markets:
Leon says that hipsters pretty much visit the Neighbourgoods Market in Jozi to take selfies and post them to Instagram…I’m inclined to agree:
Thrilling theatre shows:
My imaginary love affair with the hot AF theatre legend Jonathan Roxmouth was well documented on social media and so I just couldn’t miss the opportunity to watch him again in the local production of the iconic musical, West Side Story.
From 2015:
To 2017, my favourite Tony has my heart:
@FazielahW much much appreciated Fazielah. Thank you
So itâs that time of year again and you find yourself Bridget Jonesing through life, do you stay at home and hide or do you celebrate?
As tempting as it is to stalk your crushâs profile for the umpteenth time…donât do it for the love of your own sanity. You know that he knows that youâve been watching. So put down the ice cream and step away from the computer or close the app on your phone. There is only one option for us single gals and that is to throw yourself a Big, Phat Party and celebrate! How? You ask. Here are my Top 10 survival tips for single gals on Valentineâs Day:
1. 50 Shades Darker – oh come on now letâs not be coy youâve read all 3 books so go grab a group of your nearest and dearest gal pals and go watch the damn movie!
2. How about a good old fashion book club (*wink*wink*)? Discuss the 50 shades book with your girls whilst imbibing copious amounts of bubbly and discussing at great lengths why piercing blue eyed Ian Somerhalder was not cast as Mr Grey.
3. You know those 2 for one happy hour specials? Now you can have BOTH đ Get your Carrie on! Yay you! (please don’t drive if you choose this option)
4. How about a Movie Marathon? Jacob and Edward vs Carrie Bradshaw ? Take your pick…or why not watch bothâŚ?
5. You know that ridiculous amount of money you wouldâve blown on a romantic weekend away for two? How about that awesome pair of Manolos that you have been eyeing since well before christmas? Go BUY those damn HEELS!
6. Hop on to The Entertainer App and find a great spa deal for you and your BFF…or take the whole gaggle of girls. What could be more fun than being pampered with your friends?
Image credit:Â Â http://glamradar.com/beauty-treats-to-spoil-yourself-with-for-valentines-day
7. Travelstart has some great domestic local flights for only R499 one way, so perhaps you should still take that weekend away for yourself! Enjoy the Dolce far nienteâŚ.âthe sweetness of doing nothingâ on your own weekend Eat, Pray, Love.
8. How about spending some time with your loved ones? Prepare a nice home cooked meal for your family, crack open that bottle youâve been saving and share some good laughs.
9. Do something youâve always wanted to do. That chocolate truffle making course? Abseiling off of Table Mountain (not me) ? Learning how to surf (maybe)… cute instructor included đ #Justsaying
10. Last but not least, most importantly, is make time for you. Donât get so swept up in the dayâs activities that you forget the greatest love of all is self love. Take time to nurture that with perhaps a quiet stroll on the beach to gather your thoughts. Or pen your thoughts in a journal. Create a Vision board of your goals, dreams and desires of where you see yourself in the next few years. Donât be so hung up on not having a romantic partner that you lose sight of the most important person in your life⌅YOU!
There you have it ladies, whether youâre a Carrie or a Bridget wishing you a fantastic Valentineâs Day filled with Love!
âOh my Gawd! I thought the restroom was empty âŚSorry!â
Image credit:www.reactiongifs.com
Kids, this is what a gorgeous, blonde American yelled at me as I stood, pants around my ankles in the middle of trying to close the damn unisex loo door at Applebeeâs in New York âŚ
I had, quite stupidly in my haste to relieve myself, neglected to lock the toilet door properly and been caught sans pants (and undies!).
I was absolutely mortified for a split second, thinking that I had now further endorsed Americans âviews on African citizens being uncouth. Then I realised, well f*** it, at least one other person had seen my fabulous ass in the Big Apple, and thatâs ok with me.
“Say you’ll share with me one love,one lifetime /Say the word and I will follow you”
Kids,as my solo trip to New York came to an end in early January 2017, I was no where near ready to say goodbye to the Big Apple.
More importantly, Â I wasn’t ready to take my leave of the person I was there – a confident, Â free-spirited traveller who wasn’t afraid to take on new and amazing adventures or experiences.
The girl you see in the picture above is radiant with satisifaction; has a lust for life and most importantly, she is happy …
Happy,guys, honest-to-the-gods happy – the black moods that sometimes dominated my Capetonian nights and days;the insecurities that overwhelmed me at home didn’t exist in New York.
And while I know I was living in a bubble because life isn’t all subway rides and walks in Central Park; I wasn’t in a hurry to get back to the Mother City to be the awkward singleton who doesn’t get invited to her godchildren’s birthday parties because her status makes the other guests uncomfortable.
In New York, I grabbed opportunities to be the centre of attention by the balls (including being the fake VIP guest on an NBC Tour show):
In Cape Town, I was so used to being second or last choice, Â I didn’t even bother volunteering for shit at all.
In New York, I rode the subway often and only got lost a few times -in Cape Town, the train was a last-minute,I’m fucked and I need transport resort:
I fit in New York – for the first time,it felt like I fit my surroundings.In Cape Town, I was always a beat or two behind everyone else -people who had their shit together; people who shared the same sense of humour and the same boring plan for life; people who effoetlessly met their spouses/co-parents/lovers/partners and lived the picket white fence lifestyle. I couldn’t catch-up and I was tired of trying.
Happy New Year from New York!
I wanted to stay in New York where I belonged,Kids …
But all good things must come to an end and,though I had to leave , I made a promise to myself (and one that would set me on the path to meeting your father and finally having you!) : I’d live every day of 2017 as fearlessly and passionately as if I were in New York!
Kids,in December 2016, I travelled alone to New York City and people,who should have known better,kept asking why?
Them : “Why would you do that? And alone too? That’s crazy!”
Me (thinking it internally but I should have said it out loud): “I’m f***ing off to the other side of the world because  I am sick to death of your narrow-mindedness;  your gossiping about my sexuality; your assumptions that I must hate men and children because I have neither when it couldn’t be further from the f***ing truth and you don’t know how hard I have to work to keep my desire for having a baby under control;  because you assholes talk about me maliciously on Facebook where the world AND I can see it and you don’t even think about my feelings,do you?!!”
Like I said, there were many reasons why I travelled solo to the Big Apple but ultimately only one really mattered …my happiness.
In the space of just one week, New York quickly made me feel at home by:
1) Making me feel like a local:
Getting lost and finding myself in the Big Apple
Sure,I got lost so many times but somehow I always ended up where I was intending on going later,like Central Park, so it worked out!
2) Inspiring me on the daily:
Looking out at the New York City view
There were so many things to see and do in New York that inspiration  was seeping into my pores all of the time.I felt re-energised and motivated for the first time in a long time and I wanted to write again.Not just about one attraction  as I had been for the past two years but about a variety of topics!
Staring out at the city line from the Top of the Rock, Â I knew it was time for a career change.
3) Putting me at ease about difficult choices I’d made previously:
Magic on Broadway…Theatre and I will always find each other
When I left a side project as a theater reviewer in 2015 because my family needed me emotionally, physically and financially to help with my dying grandfather; Â people didn’t understand and so many of them faded away from my life because I was no longer available to be frivolous and fun at a red carpet opening night three times a week.
It felt like a horrible thing at the time but I do not regret spending 2016 taking care of Pa ,our family or dedicating myself to my magic career that year either…both elements thrived because I was focused and I am eternally thankful for it.
As I took in a number of Broadway shows in December, I realised that things had come full circle and this,this opportunity right here, Â to see award-winning international shows was meant to be all along.I have always been a theatre lover -I didn’t need to be “famous” to prove it.
4) Seeding a sense of wonder for myself :
I can and WILL do anything I imagine …
Thanks to the mind and emotional f***ery of He Who Must Not Be Named; being dumped by my travel buddy; warring family wanting Pa’s estate and all of the malicious gossipers; Â my sense of self-worth was f***ed royally.
Having my wits and determination to depend on to guide me and keep myself safe in the Big Apple rebirthed my self-belief.
I felt imbued with new-found confidence in the Wonder Woman I know I can be. I worked hard to get to New York again and I could do that and so much more if I just tried.
F*** the haters in my world, I am f***ing AWESOME!!
I loved New York,where I was free to be me SO much, Â I didn’t want to go home …
Kids, in 2016, New York City was stalking me like my all-time favourite musical character, The Phantom of the Opera…
“In sleep he sang to me In dreams he came That voice which calls to me and speaks my name “
Yes, yes, I know, being in love with a dark, mysterious man and hoping he’ll  lure  me to his underground lair indicates a seriously weird view of love but I was six when I fell in love with the Phantom, ok? You can’t undo a lifelong passion for Erik ( not coincidentally the name of my other forbidden love Alexander Skarsgard‘s character in True Blood!)  …
I digress…
As I toiled through a seriously f***ked up year with my dying grandfather, losing friends and general adulting f***ery, the Big Apple was appearing in my dreams on a regular basis – showing me visions of hosting my baby shower in a hipster-styled warehouse in downtown Manhattan, with the Backstreet Boys performing as special guests ( don’t ask!) and walking beneath Brooklyn Bridge with that jackass.
I didn’t have to be a shrink or a psychic to figure out that my dreams were wish-fulfillment, fantasies of wanting to escape my current situation and longing to have you but damn, did New York look enticing in my slumber!
In September of 2016, I unexpectedly received an invitation to accompany a friend and her family to the Big Apple for Christmas and I was totally floored – my secret wish to return to the concrete jungle was coming true… OMG!
Three months of planning and making arrangements for my daily life followed and by the first week of December, I was SO excited, I couldn’t wait to jet off to my dream city.
Alas…
My travelling companion cancelled at the last minute due to unforeseen circumstances and it devastated me. I felt like the same rejected kid I had been my entire life – always chosen last by friends, family, colleagues for everything.
It totally threw my life balance out of whack and I turned into this scared Moaning Myrtle who was suddenly too afraid to travel solo …who was this insecure person and what had happened to the fearless adventurer I had been before?!
After a few days of indecision and agonizing, I decided f*** it, I was still travelling to New York City … I was stronger and braver than I knew, I could do this.
Solo travel had always helped me discover myself before and helped me fall back in love with the independent, free-spirit I knew myself to be.
After a year of putting my family’s needs, my clients’projects and my friends’dreams before my own, I needed a time-out to just be me – to break out of the constraints I’d put on myself, to live, to breathe, to be me.
And that, Kids, is how I re-met New York.
Follow my Big Apple adventures on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook from Thursday 22 December, 2016 to Tuesday 3 January, 2017!
Kids, this was the line I woke up to on a plane in Istanbul in November 2010, from the gorgeous guy whose personal space I had totally invaded during the long haul flight from Johannesburg.
To say I was mortified is an understatement!
Not only had I acquired a seat mate I had NO recollection of meeting, but apparently Iâd been drooling all night on his very hunky shoulder. As if that wasnât bad enough, he was now staring into my flight seat bed head and wrinkled face⌠NOOOO!!!!
Definitely zero chance of me joining the mile high club then! Oh, just stop it with your âTMI, MOM!â nonsense!
As I prepared to jet off for my fourth international trip in 2016, I couldnât help reflecting back on my guy on the plane and giggle. So many embarrassing but fun things happen when you have the courage to travel solo đ
Kids, at times when the search for your father seemed to come to a complete stand still, it was good to get out of Cape Town and have some fun (and go where there was sure to be hot, single men …we hoped!). Luckily for your god mom Marisa and I, we were invited to the ultra-cool, must-do Darling Summer Beer Festival on Saturday 3 December, 2016.
Co-hosted by the local brewery Darling Brew and Darling Tourism , this fun day out in the gorgeous dorpie (little town) featured stalls by local cider, beer and foodie producers (Riot Brewery, Savage Brewery, Flagship Brewery, Mountain Brewing Company and Eversonâs Cider& Decider) and live music from up and coming bands like Red Tape Riot, Jimm Harisson Project & Stone Jets.
I lost my foodie heart to the Flying Pig, who conjured up such a magical Cuban sandwich, I kept dreaming about it for days after the event.
Our eclectic mix of Igers was transported to the Festival in a super rad Nomad Tours truck and let me tell you, it’s a driving experience unlike any other I have ever had.
Iâll readily admit that I wasnât much of a craft beer drinker before the Festival ( the last time I had chugged down some ale was when I was trying to impress Monroe on a night out âŚand we all know how well that turned out âNOT!) but I thoroughly enjoyed the Gypsy Mask and the Midnight Hawk brews.
One of the stalls at the market made a mean beer-infused ice cream that was easily my favourite item of the day!
These are some of our tasty memories of the Festival:
Kids, after Mr âLetâs Go Dutchâ, I was a little gun shy about meeting new people â spending two hours with someone boring who hogged ALL of the attention just wasnât appealing.
Also, after the spate of bad, and I mean, BAD online dating chats that were leading nowhere fast, I had all but given up hope of ever finding your Dad.
Hope, though, always springs eternal for singletons and so I turned to back to my old faithful, Â Ok Cupid, for a bit of a romantic shake-up.
Hereâs a look at that time I schooled an American tourist in the art of dating a Capetonian woman:
September 2016 âŚ
Tdater 31 was a Pennsylvanian engineer, visiting Cape Town for the first time ever (I am stressing this because it becomes important later in the story) for his sisterâs wedding. After a weird stop and start, we got into a rhythm of flirting (mostly him because as I might have mentioned, I am Bridget Jones-bad at picking up hints that guys are into me).
Date One was a coffee (and that was the actual hot drink, NOT the other hook-up kind of coffee) and pizza meeting at Cape Townâs new caffeine hot spot, the Honeybadger in Loop Street.
He wasnât impressed I was keeping the date to 90 minutes because I had a movie date planned with your Spirit Mom (screw it, weâd won tickets for a Michael Fassbender movie and there was NO way I was missing out on it!).
We got along well, though, chatting about Star Trek, Comic Con, work and family. He was funny and smart but âŚ
Tdater31 seemed to have no sense of desire to explore Cape Town, a city he had travelled 25 hours plus to visit. Â Call me crazy but I always research a destination before I visit it to know whatâs on and where I should explore. Hell, Iâve stalked New York so often, I feel like I live there.
Mr Man was annoyed that I had to work and that I had a social life filled with family and friends âengagements that I wouldnât cancel to spend time with him:
Bro, let us be clear on a couple of things: a) I am a busy woman with a full life who will not be your personal tour guide and b) no man comes before my friends and family.
Against my better judgment, I agreed to a second date because hey, maybe he was nervous and just coming across as a doos inaccurately.
Date TwoâŚ
SighâŚ
At 30, I still had to learn to trust my gut feelings about people. If I found you annoying, boring and a pain in my ass the first time I met you, that impression would not change later.
Tdater31 had indicated that he wasnât into the big touristy things like the attractions and he wanted to experience what the locals do as well as the local cuisine. Since it was First Thursdays, I decided weâd do that and then I would take him to Biesmiellah in Bo Kaap for some authentic Malay dishes.
Right away, he pissed me off by being WAY too handsy ⌠I do not like people touching me unless I initiate it and grabbing my ass repeatedly or balancing bottles on my head while I was crouching to snap a photo was not winning him any brownie points.
Secondly, he did nothing but bitch about how most of the patrons at the Gin Bar were white. Where were the locals, the Africans, he wanted to know. Jerk, are you seriously getting racial on me? Caucasians are f***ing local!
The moaning about not wanting to leave his hotel room because he didnât want to go where all the tourists were carried on throughout this date from hell.
By 7pm, I had had enough of Tdater31 and his narrow-minded bigotry and stupidity so I helped him order his âauthenticâ meal, stuck him with the bill and wished him safe travels back to Pennsylvania with a âYeah, I am never visiting you, see ya!â
