Kids, you remember how 21st century dating lingo got the best of me in 2016? Well, in 2017, I was seriously f***ing lost in translation!
July 2017 …
I’d swiped right on the hot Julianno’s photo on Tinder and we were a match! Hallelujah!
“According to tinder, I should say hello 😉 “, he texted and from there we were chatting away merrily until…
I asked him to tell him more about himself and he responded with:
“I’m a musician, nutrition advisor and I do a bit of modelling. But all in all, I’m journeying intentionally”
What new f***ery was this?! Even after I asked this Confucius wanna-be to explain further, all he could offer was “Simple… my moves are intentional and with purpose”.
I was still pretty confused, and I had to turn to your auntie Lee-Anne, mistress of deciphering guys’ bullshit, to translate for me.
“Honey, when a boy says shit like that, what he means is he is only looking to f***”
Oh! Right, so basically he is like Mr Instantaneous Convergence of two years before.
No wonder he disappeared from my DMs like mist before the sun after the conversation died out.
F*** it! NEXT!