How I Met Your Father: The Married Friend’s Perspective

Hey spirit children – it’s me, your Auntie Leo, a.k.a. Lady Littlefinger-Mormont-Cumberbatch!

faz and Leo 2

This is perhaps a good time to weigh in on your mother’s adventures for a healthy dose of perspective, as well as sharing some sage advice.

At the time of writing this, your mom and I had been friends for about 18 months. We met when I had a short contract with the company she was working for, and we initially bonded over our mutual love of chocolate, magic and the embodiment of male perfection – Alexander Skarsgard. As the months rolled on, she introduced me to Beefcakes, and your drunk uncle Tendai and I introduced her to Game of Thrones, if memory serves me right. If you hear nicknames flying around, don’t judge us.

Rocking it House of Wyrd style at a Game of Thrones viewing in 2015!
Rocking it House of Wyrd style at a Game of Thrones viewing in 2015!

A word on your mom. It’s hard to see your parents’ awesomeness when you’re a moody teen with raging hormones.  So take it from me:  Your mother is without a doubt one of the most amazing people that walk this earth. She’s a kind and generous spirit who lives with passion, loves fiercely, supports unconditionally and allows her friends to let their freak flags fly without any judgement.

She’s a great catch for any man (or lady) who can keep up with her, so imagine my surprise when I discovered that she’s still single.

Or was I really that surprised?

You see, my dear spirit children, Cape Town may be the most beautiful city in all of the world, but it’s damn hard to find a man in the Mother City who ticks ALL of these non-negotiable boxes:

  • Good (as in, a good man, not “good at sports”)
  • Kind
  • Fun (as in, makes you laugh)
  • Financially secure (I’m not talking rich here; one simply reaches an age when spongers stop being sexy)
  • Mentally stable
  • Straight

How do I know it’s hard? Because I struggled to find a guy like that as a young and awesome singleton in the late 90s.

Those were the days before social media and online dating, so your only hope in hell was to join a church (hell NO), shag a work colleague, go clubbing – a LOT – or meet a guy through friends. In my case, I met your uncle W. on a blind date set up by mutual friends. And despite my much longer list of requirements (that also included career choices and physical characteristics), we hit it off and have been together for almost 17 years.

Today, the dating pool has become a bit polluted, I’m afraid. You have to work your way through the dazed and (sexually) confused, the psychos, the narcissists, the stalkers, the emotionally unstable, the wannabes, the crazies, the douchebags, the ones that are attached but pretend to be single / at the point of breaking up to give you hope…  And you have to work through this pool every single time you take a stab at love.

All in all, despite all the new romance platforms available to your mom, I’ve come to the conclusion that love is much harder to find these days.

So what’s a girl to do?

But the point of my story is not to make your mom depressed to the point of believing that she will never find love…

She will.  I know she will.

Because she’s awesome!

6-youre-awesome-puppy-dating-advice-help-me-find-love

And because she still has lots of time.

Right now my message to your mom is “DON’T PANIC! You will meet your baby daddy when you least expect it.”

My dad always used to say that (and I’m translating and paraphrasing here) love is like sudden-onset diarrhoea. It comes when you least expect it! Yeah, I know… not the most romantic vision of love, but I’ve come to find that it’s true.  I have friends who met their partners when they least expected to. Someone I know forgot about her blind date, remembered at the last minute, put her dirty hair in a ponytail and pulled on some jeans. Her blind date is now her husband and they have a beautiful baby.

All your mom needs to be is her own amazing self, and the right guy will follow.

My feeling? She’s going to meet Mr Right through the House of Wyrd (ask her about that), get chatting to him at a theatre bar or in the line at Free Comic Book Day. The universe works in mysterious ways…

That being said, I’m still holding out for the day when she bumps into Alexander Skarsgard in a random city on a random street (Alex, watch this space for when we’re in the US, OK?) and is finally united with her one true love J

16 thoughts on “How I Met Your Father: The Married Friend’s Perspective”

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